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Funny Picture:

The Captain

The Captain

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Funny Joke:

What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common? Both have about a one in 3 million chance of becoming a human being!

Funny Sms Text:

No one person can possibly combine all the elements supposed to make up what everyone means by friendship.

Funny One-Liner:

Einstein used science to get laid; that guy is a genius... I've been using money.