First-year students at Med School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human body. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them, "In medicine, it is necessary to have 2 important qualities as a doctor. The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body." For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth. "Go ahead and do the same thing,"! he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and sucking on it. When everyone had finished, the Professor looked at them and told them, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger. Now learn to pay attention."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. A nun made a note and posted it on the apple tray: "Take only ONE……God is watching." Further along the line, at the other end of the table, was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note: "Take all you want……God is watching the apples."
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked, "is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family of seven) answered, "thou shall not kill."
Here is a teacher that is waiting for her students to arrive to school none of them arrive yet she still waiting for all twenty students ten minutes later 5 students arive the teacher says where were you? They say on top of the blue berry mountain. Another ten minutes later another five students came in the teacher says where were you? The students say on top of the blueberry mountain another ten minutes later another five students came in and the teacher says where were you and they say on top of the blueberry mountain then finally the last ten minutes later and the last five students come in and the teacher says where were you and the students say on top of the blueberry mountain then this naked woman comes in the class,and the teacher says I AM THE BLUEBERRY MOUNTAIN!
It was the last day of school kids bring in candy stuff like that. And theses couple bring in a leaky box so the teacher takes a lick"Is it wine" no the kids say.ok I give up its a puppy miss.